I don't really know how it all happened, and I'm not really clear about where it's all leading to. But about the present I know. Be it social ,biological or a mixture of both arriving to forty years of age, is meeting me in a different way than all the rest have - to date.
I cannot play cool, forty does feel
like a coming of age - am i actually growing up?...am I actually at the gates
of mature world? - well if am i want to
stay here - at the gate! I never liked mature - or at least quite a number of
common understandings i understood (or do i still?) it brings with it.
Movement, change, growth, big,
loud, bright, colourful, beyond, and joy are what I'm interested in, in no order of
preference. But the sort of maturity that does not include these - well no
thank you!
Now I'm aware it does not all
depend on me - but until it does that's the recipe! I truly believe that if
when the boss will impose otherwise - if he is the boss I believe he is - or
she is for some of you out there I know - I truly believe it will be full of movement,
change, growth, big, loud, bright, colourful, beyond, and joy, perhaps not in
the way i understand it today, not in the shape form, physical reality we perceive
it but others - in the mean time I'm training - like being at the gym - but
without impacting my growing footprint on the planet.
I don't know if linguists have ever
thought about it but "forty" phonetically sound like "for tea".
And indeed it feels a bit like arriving for tea! Taking a moment, nourishing
the fruits of so much labour put into the cuppa - including the tea growers,
farmers cows, up to the kitchen hands that checked that the water was fully
boiling to make it a fully fletched infusion as it should be!
I have now arrived for tea (its
also a good way of not needing to face the numerical integer that limits the greatness
- sadness and madness not to be mentioned - of the actual moment). So for those
who have accompanied here - thanks - whether you where always on my good or not
so good books - do books even matter in front of a cuppa?
To the special ones a
special thanks - you know I'm finicky about tea and greedy too - so thanks for
the tea! I hope and look forward for more i'll come for more!
Having arrived here makes me now
have to leave for tea! the pleasures! Leave! Movement! change! growth!, big!, loud!, bright!, colourful!,
beyond!, and joy! Leave to walk the walk and act the talk!....continue crossing roads and
building ones anew, until the movement changes, the big, loud, bright and
colourful, will fade away.
Towards a beyond that will be different but will be
joyful anyway, because until than ill be training - like at the gym - Movement,
change, growth, big, loud, bright, colourful, beyond, and joy...beyond and joy!
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